25 everyday examples of rape-culture: an exploration.

Posted: April 10, 2014 in Uncategorized

Ah, rape culture. Rapey rape Mcrape! Just saying that word gives me a boner. Seriously, I’ve used it 4 times already and I’ve surprised I haven’t creamed myself yet.

Ok, I wasn’t being serious there at all. Anyone who reads these blogs should know how serious I am when it comes to rape. It’s one of the topics that has perhaps been the focus of more of these articles than any other subject. I think the only thing that comes close is gender violence.

So, why is it that I constantly feel the need to caveat all these articles with pointless rhetoric like ‘I’m aware that rape is a horrible crime’? I know it’s a horrible crime, you know it’s a horrible crime, pretty much everyone aside from rapists know it’s a horrible crime. Yet even talking about rape makes everyone anxious, makes everyone do a collective sharp intake of breath. Want to know why? Because if you say something that’s even slightly controversial then you can guaran-damn-tee that some jumped up harpy with a grudge and an opinion will be right behind you waiting to tell you how much of a misogynist you are.

I’ll state it once again, nice and large and in bold just to get the point across – rape is horrible. Better? Hopefully I can now get on with the rest of this article and not have to mention again what I think of the act of rape.

Why do I write so many articles about rape? Well, do you know how many articles there are on the internet that are about rape? Thousands, possibly millions, so this being my 6th or 7th on the matter is really no big deal. If there are people out there who want to talk about rape from their perspective, who’s going to begrudge me the opportunity to talk about it from my perspective? Yes, I’ve never been raped but I do have some experience of it, and it’s an experience that comes in handy for this particular entry.

If you’re a feminist, or even if you’re not, you’ve probably heard of the term ‘rape-culture’. It’s the idea that we, as a society, or, more particularly, as a western society, have normalised, trivialised and accepted the act of rape into our culture with such finality that it doesn’t bother us when we encounter stories of rape, we don’t believe those who claim to have been raped, we make jokes about rape, blame the victims, etc, etc. There are a lot of articles on rape culture, most of them heavily feminism-based, that deal with the culture we live in and how rape is such a pervasive and horrendous crime.

I don’t disagree with the last one (rape is horrible) but I do disagree with the first one. I don’t believe we live in a ‘rape-culture’, and even if we did it’s so far away from what feminists define as ‘rape-culture’ that they are barely comparable.

So why the focus on ‘rape-culture’? Well, I recently came across a helpful article demonstrating what it was. I can’t be bothered to keep using inverted commas when I talk about ‘rape-culture’, so every time you see the words ‘rape-culture’ imagine I’m doing this:


So, on with the show. This is the helpful article I’m talking about:


Yep, 25 everyday examples of rape culture:


(just in case you forgot!)

What it’s interesting to notice about this article (and, indeed, a lot of articles about rape culture) primarily focuses on women. “But hold on a second, John, surely that makes sense as women are raped all the time. And, like, isn’t it impossible for a man to be raped? Unless it’s by another man, in which case that’s nothing to do with feminism.” Well, just read on to see why I don’t think that’s necessarily the case.

What is made abundantly clear is that rape culture revolves around women. In these 25 every day examples there is one, just one, mention of men, and it’s a massively misquoted and unreliable statistic. That’s what feminists think about male rape – well, men have it bad, women have it worse. That’s the overarching nature of this article. It’s also misleading in a few of its examples.

I’m going to try and provide some more balance to this article, not because I want to perpetuate rape culture, simply because I feel that the focus primarily on female victims, and particularly some of the ambiguities within this very article, are themselves perpetuating rape culture, if it indeed exists, by using shaky statistics and ignoring a massive set of victims.

First of all, we’re given a nice breakdown of what exactly rape culture is. What I would like to talk about is this particular paragraph:

‘In reading through feminist forums and articles online, particularly in articles about rape or sexual assault, I notice that sometimes in the comments section, people make statements about how rape culture is just a phrase that’s made up to make men look bad or to make it seem like rape is something that happens far more often than it actually does.’

‘to make it seem like rape is something that happens far more often than it actually does.’ Apparently some people think rape culture is used by feminists to create a culture of fear and allow them to peddle their own statistics. Remember that quote, because it’s important later on.

And then, perhaps the most important bit:

‘More often than not, it’s situations in which sexual assault, rape, and general violence are ignored, trivialized, normalized, or made into jokes.’

Let’s get started:

Point number 1:

1. A university in Canada that allows the following student orientation chant: “Y is for your sister. O is for oh-so-tight. U is for underage. N is for no consent. G is for grab that ass.”

I’ll leave all the links in so you can peruse them at your leisure. The story in question – students at ‘Frosh’ event (which I’m assuming is akin to the Uk’s ‘Freshers Week) sing a song quite unambiguously about rape.

I don’t disagree the chant was a stupid thing to do, perhaps made more incomprehensible that it was performed to 400 people, but I don’t think this, or the other examples on this list, is‘rape-culture’. I think it shows some young people (both male and female by the way) doing some incredibly stupid shit, shit they probably thought was just a bit of fun. What’s interesting though is the reaction. According to the definition of rape culture above, it’s a society which condones and trivialises rape. This article:


shows that tolerance for rape chants is pretty low, judging by the resignation of the student president and the punishment of everyone else who broke the College’s rules, punishments ranging from fines to expulsion.

2. Pop music that tells women “you know you want it” because of these “blurred lines” (of consent).

Right, ok, I get where this is coming from now. Ok, so we can be completely subjective about what we decide is ‘rape-culture’ and what isn’t. That’s cool, in that case this one is easy to disagree with.

Feminists think Blurred Lines is about rape. I don’t think Blurred Lines is about rape. In fact, last year I even wrote my own blog on it, and how the feminist response was actually a lot crueller:


So, some parts of rape culture are simply the way we interpret songs. That’s cool, I’ll remember that for future use.

3. A judge who sentenced only 30 days in jail to a 50-year-old man who raped a 14-year-old girl (who later committed suicide), and defended that the girl was “older than her chronological age.”

Again, this is another one I can’t refute. It’s a pretty fucked thing to do and say, but, again, not quite as simple as that. Is this event, a man who only gets 30 days for rape because the girl was ‘older’, then what type of culture is it when numerous female teachers skip jail completely when they rape underage boys? Because, like, it happens. A lot. And even if they do go to prison, it’s very rarely for any great length of time, and even rarer for it to be longer than a man who’s committed the same crime. Again, this example of rape culture completely focuses on one part of it, the male side, and seems to forget that women have committed similar, or worse, crimes and received similar leniency or less. Like this woman, whose lawyers actually tried to get the judge to not send her to prison:


two years for raping a boy 50 times in two years? Oh, we’ll come to the terminology used later on.

4. Mothers who blame girls for posting sexy selfies and leading their sons into sin, instead of talking with their sons about their responsibility for their own sexual expression.

For some reason the link to the actual blog discussed in the attached article is not working. Luckily it’s pretty much copied into the Jezebel article.

I have to say, not seeing where there’s any mention of rape? Is it rape culture for a religious mother to not want her sons to see girls in skimpy clothes? This is the kind of fruit-loop ‘no sex before marriage’ religiousness I expect from Texas (highly stereotypical I know) but, far from perpetuating rape culture, it’s quite offensive to men as well. I still can’t see where there’s any mention of the boys being tempted to rape the girls who are showing off their bodies in their selfies, simply that they don’t think those girls respect themselves and they consider it a sin for their sons to look upon. Hypocritical, especially considering that, apparently, their sons have topless photos of themselves? Probably, though dragging the boys into this is unfair as it appears it’s only the mother writing, for all we know the boys could be horrified. So, yeah, religious nuttery but not rape-culture.

5. Photo memes like this: (you’ll have to go to the actual article for the picture, but it’s basically an edited ‘I need feminism because’ type picture.)

This is another one of those ‘false rape accusations are rare so this is victim blaming’ responses. Actually, the scenario on the right has happened, many times, and the men involved have suffered for it. In fact, many men have suffered from false rape accusations. Also, far from being a perpetuation of rape-culture, it’s also incredibly offensive to men. That’s what rape-culture does, it is offensive to men, because it suggests we’re all monolithic cretins who accept blindly everything we’re taught. ‘Society taught him to rape’. Well no, him being a fucking psycho was what caused him to rape. You demonising every man as moronic and needing to be educated is not a helpful solution, nor does it really get men to join your crusade.

6. Supporting athletes who are charged with rape and calling their victims career-destroyers.

I wondered when Steubenville would make an appearance. This is a tricky, and extremely sensitive, issue. You can’t bring this one up without there being a fuck-ton of accusations of misogyny thrown at you. I’m going to try and be sensitive because I really do think this issue is one that needs to be discussed without all the hysteria that currently surrounds it.

Yes, this case was not well known until someone leaked the info to the press (I believe it was Anonymous, but I’m not sure), yes, the community was not particularly supportive of the girl coming forward but, as with the Frosh chant, it’s more a case of individual idiocy than a cultural thing. Note the reaction to the story when it did become public knowledge. Did people follow the Steubenville community’s lead? Doesn’t look like, instead it would appear that most people were outraged and, funnily enough, the culprits did some pretty serious jail time.

As for the ‘calling their victims career-destroyers’ bit, I can’t comment on the actual community itself as most stories on the net are about the reaction, not what was actually said, but I did see a lot of criticism directed towards the news outlets who reported the story. There was a lot of focus on the accused and how their promising athletic careers had been destroyed.

This is the rape shield law in America:


As you can see, identification of the victim is illegal (I believe the Steubenville girl has still not been identified?), so what else are the news reports going to talk about? “Hell, a girl in Steubenville has been raped, we can’t talk about her because it’s illegal, and we don’t want to talk about the boys involved because they’re scum. Goodbye!” That would go down well.

What’s interesting about this piece is that, yes, the focus was on the men, but I don’t see anywhere where they say “damn her for getting these boys arrested.” What does seem to take place is, filling the void left by the absence of the victim, a talk about how this decision will affect their careers. The fact is, getting sent to jail for rape will affect your career, that’s a given. Going to jail for any crime will affect your career. The fact these news reports talked about that makes sense. It makes more sense considering these boys were sixteen and, according to news reports, looked crushed and dejected when the sentences were read out, as I suppose one might.

Is it rape culture to simply talk about the effect a rape sentence has on two 16 year olds? I don’t think so. It’s a fact their careers have been destroyed, completely of their own accord I hasten to add, but you can’t argue with facts. The fact that not much attention was given to the victim was probably due to the aforementioned rape shield laws. In the UK there is always focus on the accused and never the accuser, that’s because, like the USA, it’s illegal to name a victim, therefore making any discussion of them extremely limited.

So yeah, there was no suggestion, from that article, I could see that suggested the victim herself was being blamed for destroying their careers, just that their careers had been destroyed with the guilty verdict. Talking about how rape affects the perpetrators live, particularly young men, is apparently massively offensive.

7. Companies that create decals of a woman bound and gagged in order to “promote their business.”

Using abuse to promote your product? Because men have never been shown in a subjugated position have they? I think my article on Dolce and Gabbana will see to that:


But never mind print ads, what about this hilarious advert for Virgin that implies male prison rape:


Bad taste? Sure. Rape Culture? No.

 8. People who believe that girls “allow themselves to be raped.”

I’m struggling to find anywhere in that article where such a quote is uttered.

9. Journalists who substitute the word “sex” for “rape” – as if they’re the same thing.

‘Sex’ is used in the headline and that’s it, just the one time. ‘Rape’ is used twice thereafter.

I do find it massively ironic that a feminist is complaining about the substitution of the word ‘sex’ for ‘rape’ and claiming it as indicative of rape culture when that is exactly what happens when female teachers, or even just females, are reported to have raped underage boys. We go back to this article:


He was 8 when it started, yet she ‘had sex’ with him 50 times, she didn’t rape him. There are numerous other stories of females ‘having relationships’ or ‘sleeping with’ young boys. Well done feminists, you’ve just proven, with one point, that your rape culture only affects women. Bravo.

10. Politicians distinguishing “legitimate rape” and stating that rape is “something that God intended to happen,” among other horrendous claims.

Yeah, finding it hard to disagree with this one. Though, again, I’d say more just an example of some complete fuckwits who happen to get into powerful positions than an example of rape culture, particularly considering some of the things that have been said about male rape. “But these people shouldn’t be in these positions in the first place.” Yeah, again, can’t disagree with that, but then loads of politicians and, to a similar extent, celebrities have said fucked up things. Natalie Portman, for example, thinks it’s ok to for a woman to slap a man because it’s some kind of sisterly bonding exercise or some ridiculous shit like that. I don’t see feminists using that to define ‘violence culture’.

11. Calling college students who have the courage to report their rapes liars.

This is slightly misleading. Yes, the woman in the story was raped and, yes, she was not believed, but this heading suggests that nobody believed her. In fact, reading the story it was just her counsellor that didn’t believe her. Not that that makes it better, but the reaction after it became public did, with numerous positive comments directed towards her and some pretty decent developments in stopping such events happening again.

It’s at this point I’m beginning to see a pattern – 1) that all these examples are about horrible men who victimise girls, horrible men who are in positions of power and let rapists walk free, horrible men who interchange ‘rape’ and ‘sex’ as if they’re both the same (which is funny considering some feminists think exactly that). 2) rape culture is when one person does something bad to a rape victim, not when numerous people then condemn that person and does something about it, or when one ambiguous thing (like a song, or a truck decal) is automatically offensive to women, but no consideration is made to men who have gone through the same thing.

Anyway, on with number 12:

12. The ubiquity of street harassment – and how victims are told that they’re “overreacting” when they call it out.

No link this time? Yeah, that’s helpful. And don’t point me to the Everyday Sexism Project, because that’s on very shaky ground:


Tell me some of the people highlighted in the above article aren’t over-reacting? Saying something is ‘ubiquitous’ (meaning ‘everywhere’) and then providing not a single shred of evidence is not particularly helpful.

13. Victims not being taken seriously when they report rapes to their university campuses.

The link takes you to this article:


that ends with the following line:

‘What happened in the situations under investigation is unclear.’

So yeah, rape culture is when something is under investigation, though we have no idea what actually happened. Talk about guilty until proven innocent. The article can only make claims and allege stuff at the moment, until something cast-iron comes out of this investigation, such as ‘yes, the college was wrong’, then there’s very little we can take away from this as pertains to rape culture.

That’s like someone taking a look at my finances and then someone else saying ‘well, he must have been fiddling the books’.  It’s under investigation; let’s wait until something happens before we cast aspersions.

Rape jokes – and people who defend them.

If you’re going to go after rape jokes, why not all controversial jokes? Why not jokes about paedophiles, murderers, religions, etc, etc, etc. While you’re at it why not ban mother-in-law jokes as well. I’m not being facetious; I just think that focusing on one particular area of comedy that you happen to disagree with is pretty ridiculous. What makes a rape joke worth banning more than a paedophile joke (jokes that normally have a man in the paedophile position, just FYI)?

I’m not going to go on about why comedy shouldn’t be censored, this is isn’t the time and I don’t want to go off-topic, but I don’t think it should. And this is coming from someone who doesn’t particularly find rape jokes funny.

15. Sexual assault prevention education programs that focus on women being told to take measures to prevent rape instead of men being told not to rape.

Again, no link given. I always think these ones are completely subjective. Pretty much every other crime in existence has some kind of ‘preventative-culture’ assigned to it. We’re told to make sure our valuables are out of sight when we leave our cars in public, there are adverts on national television telling you to make sure your valuables are out of sight when you leave your house. There are adverts on TV telling you not to leave your phone on the table when you’re in a bar. There are adverts warning you not to display your valuables if walking alone at night.

Just take a look at the first page of videos to come up when ‘don’t leave your valuables on show’ is typed into Youtube:


If we’re told of the dangers of most other kinds of crimes, why is it such a big deal that we teach women how to be safe when out and about? I wrote an article about this issue too, and hw I think the ‘teach men not to rape, don’t teach women not to be raped’ actually places a massive amount of victimhood on the women themselves, and absolves them of any sort of responsibility for their own actions:


I also disagree with the idea that we don’t teach men that rape is bad. In fact, there are national adverts that deal with that exact issue. And, guess what? They are all, without fail, aimed at men:


So there we have it, we live in a culture that teaches women not to get raped, rather than teaching men not to rape. Except, we really don’t live in that culture. Yeah sure, teach women to be safe and wary of their surroundings, because that’s what happens with loads of other crimes. And how exactly do we live in a culture that ‘normalises’ rape when there are adverts shown on terrestrial television that campaign against rape.

16. The victimization of hospital patients, especially people with mental health issues and the elderly,  by the very people who are there to protect them.

Again, another tricky one. Yeah, what happened in the article was horrible, but if you honestly believe that that’s the only example of elderly or vulnerable patients being victimized while in places that should be safe and caring then you’re cherry picking your arguments.

Just one example of females (because, so far, this list seems to be exclusively male) who prey on vulnerable patients:


17. Reddit threads with titles like “You just have to make sure she’s dead” when linking to the story of a 13-year-old girl in Pakistan being raped and buried alive.

I did a search on Google for that very title and found nothing:


Now, I’m not saying it didn’t exist at one time or another, but is it a culture that ‘normalises’ rape if the thread has been removed? I’d say pretty much the opposite. If we thought rape was normal then surely people wouldn’t care about it being removed. The fact that it possibly existed in the first place does not confirm rape culture, not by feminist standards anyway.

The fact we have a link to the story itself and not the Reddit thread leads me to question the manipulative nature of this particular point.

18. Reddit threads dedicated to men causing women pain during sex (I’m not going to give the thread credence by linking to it).

Then you’ll forgive me for not feeling the need to say anything about it. I get the feeling Reddit is a bit like 4Chan, full of trolls. Having never ventured over there, save for a couple of links others have posted, I honestly couldn’t tell you.

What I will say is this – if the pain is consensual, what’s the problem?

19. Twitter hashtags that support accused rapists and blame victims.

I’m afraid I have absolutely no idea who that person is, so cannot say anything about this point. Sorry.

20. Publicly defending celebrities accused of rape just because they’re celebrities and ignoring or denouncing what the victim has to say.

The link takes you to a story defending Woody Allen against all the allegations made by Dylan and Ronan Farrow, accusations that first appeared in 1991. Again, this is an example of guilty until proven innocent. Nothing came of these charges in 1991 when they first appeared, yet people are still determined to try and find him guilty one way or the other. Discussing why you think someone is innocent of a crime is not rape culture, and to think otherwise is why men still serve prison time for false rape accusations.

21. Assuming that false reporting for sexual assault cases are the norm, when in reality, they’re only 2-8%, which is on par with grand theft auto.

I’ve had a quick read of the report that is linked to in this point and it contains a very interesting paragraph:

To date, the MAD study is the only research conducted in the U.S. to evaluate the percentage

of false reports made to law enforcement. The remaining evidence is therefore based on research conducted outside the U.S., but it all converges within the same range of 2-8%.

 To clarify, the MAD study (or ‘Making a Difference’) took all the allegations of sexual assault from 8 US communities and found that, of 2,059 cases, 140 (7%) were found to be false. That stands to be within the 2-8% range stated above. However, can you really use data taken from only 8 communities as proof of the whole country? Unless I’ve mistaken the study it seems a rather small section of American culture to be taking their data one, especially as it is the only piece of research conducted in the US on such matters.

In the UK, there was a report published earlier this year that had official numbers of reported rapes taken from every police force in the country, which published some interesting results. I wrote about it here:


In that report it’s made clear that the ‘no-crime’ (which I would imagine includes false reports) varies from county to county, so there’s no way you can take 8 communities and say ‘here is a picture of American culture’. I also question just how biased the report in point 21 is, considering it’s published by The National Centre for the Prosecution of Violence against Women.

I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone say that false reporting is the norm just that it’s more common than the 2-8% that feminists constantly throw at us. There’s also a difference between sexual assault and rape. This article is supposedly everyday examples of rape culture, so which one is it? Are you linking the two together, or just picking and choosing which bits best fit your agenda?

22. Only 3% of rapists ever serving a day in jail.

The link that this takes you to is rather lacking in any real information. I’ll link it here just to make you aware of what they are using to back up their claims:


It’s a handy little infographic that breaks down how many rapists actually see prison from how many are reported. It actually does give sources, but they aren’t linked, so there’s no way of getting to them, and I have absolutely no energy to go on a Google-goose chase trying to find each report.

Again, these statistics seem to contradict the ones given in the article I wrote above:


which suggests that 10 times as many rapists are being punished. I get that my article is talking about the UK and point 22 is talking about America, but ‘rape-culture’ now seems to be an ocean-spanning phenomenon, especially considering the 1-in-4 myth, originally taken from American college studies, has now become the standard statistic in Britain, too.

I suppose the key thing to look at is the word ‘jail’. Lots of people get arrested and charged for crimes but don’t actually serve any jail time, most of them are women. The fact that this particular point only refers to someone being jailed could be seen as slightly misleading as there are cases of rapists being given suspended sentences, or probation, which means they are being punished, just not going to jail. I also find it rather ironic that this whole article seems to be implying men are the ones who are responsible for rape culture, and men are the ones who escape justice, yet there are numerous cases of females committing crimes against males, not just rape, and serving no prison time whatsoever.

I also think this is an interesting comment:

‘Factoring in unreported rapes, only about 3% of rapists will ever serve a day in prison’

‘Factoring in unreported rapes.’ So basically they are using figures that don’t exist to help back up their claim that only 3 out of 100 rapists will go to prison. Is there any way of proving that only 40 rapes out of 100 are reported? If there isn’t then this statistic becomes nothing but conjecture.

23. Women feeling less safe walking the streets at night than men do.

Another interesting article that throws up lots of questions and differing ways of interpreting it. Yes, it would appear from the face value of the statistics that women in every country polled feel less safe walking down the street at night. But why? Is it because of rape culture, or something else?

First of all, this poll suggests nothing about the crimes the people are scared of encountering. So why a general poll like this has been interpreted as a key factor in rape culture is unclear.

Also, if you look at the countries where women don’t feel safe, it seems a lot of the top 27 are those that are heavily influenced by feminism. Even Sweden, a place that seems to bow to every feminist desire, have only 2 thirds of women say they feel safe at night.

This is where there is a big chain of events that starts with false statistics. Feminists state that 1-in-4 women will be raped in their lifetime (sometimes it’s presented as 1-in-5). The fact that statistic is peddled all over the place leads to a culture of fear, a culture of fear that means women are more wary of their surroundings than others. Due to that fear, and numerous other pieces of false rhetoric, women then start to fear being victims of other crimes as well, and therefore start to feel less safe. That’s why false statistics cause so much damage. There’s so much propaganda about violence towards women that, despite feminists claiming they want to eradicate it, they create their own culture of fear.

On the other hand, men, while supposedly feeling safe, were not actually safe:







I’m not saying we should take the above statistics as gospel, but they all seem to paint a similar picture – when it comes to feeling safe while walking the streets at night, womens fear may be misplaced, mens confidence is definitely misplaced.

Those statistics also fall, for the most part, into the ‘women are more likely to be raped/abused than men’ camp as well, which we know to be unreliable at best, so there’s definitely some leeway, and some reports contradict each other. Perhaps the one thing to take away from those 3 reports is that it’s extremely difficult to really pin down numbers on violence, abuse and rape, so to claim we absolutely live in a ‘rape-culture’ is, again, shaky at best.

24. 1-in-5 women and 1-in-71 men having reported experiencing rape.

A pretty comprehensive looking set of results. But very strange that every heading in the attached file involves women, but only a few involve men. It’s almost as if they’re picking and choosing the studies that help prove their point. It’s also clear that some of the studies cited only involve women, so you’re automatically leaving out one half of the population.

Results that also contradict other studies and CDC’s own findings on ‘made to penetrate’:



(sorry if the image quality on the last one if poor).

So, again, it’s incredibly difficult to actually collect any cast-iron data on rapes between men and women, and so many contradictory reports being released, a lot of which contradict the ‘1-in-4’ statistic, means it’s impossible to accept any one set of data and say ‘yes, that empirically confirms rape culture exists.’

Plus, the fact that the 1-in-4 myth varies itself so wildly, from 1-in-4 to 1-in-3 to 1-in-5, suggests that even feminists don’t know which statistic to use.

25. The fact that we have to condition ourselves not to use violent language in our everyday conversations.

Ah, the helpful final point. This one links to an article published on Everyday Feminism, so automatically take it with a pinch of salt. The article claims that everyday sexualized language, such as ‘suck my dick’ if you disagree with someone, is ‘rape-permitting’.


If that’s the case, if that’s what they think, then I will provide a link to another of my blog entries (because apparently that’s definitely allowed and taken to be some sort of gospel truth, as long as you throw a couple of links in there, which I have done):


So, you think sexualized/violent insults are ‘rape-permitting’? I disagree. Who’s right and who’s wrong? Is it as simple as that? I don’t think so. Unfortunately, disagreeing with a feminist about rape is just asking to be called a misogynist. This is a point that could be argued for all eternity and people still wouldn’t be happy.

I do find it interesting, however, that this sexualized/violent language, once again, is indicative of a culture geared towards violence and hatred of women, not men, and how it perpetuates rape culture which, as we’ve seen in this article, is predominantly committed against women.


So there we have it, 25 everyday examples of ‘rape-culture’. Now, as I feel the need to say about every blog on rape, my intention is not to trivialise, normalise or ignore rape, not at all, it’s simply to raise a countering side to these arguments. I’ve said it already in this entry, rape is a horrendous crime, and in no way am I casting aside the suffering that those who have been raped have suffered. But, and it’s a big but, the whole idea of ‘rape-culture’, if the list provided above is anything to go by, is built on something that can’t be quantifiably proven, is down to some subjectivity and, perhaps most importantly, appears to only focus on one gender. Can you imagine if you were a man and you thought ‘rape-culture awareness’ was something that would allow you to come clean about your experiences, only to find out that your voice seems to ostracized, not recognized? It’s strange that feminists claim ‘rape-culture’ is where we normalise and ignore rape victims, yet they perpetuate the very thing they claim to hate by ignoring and disregarding the experiences of male victims.

So, what I thought I’d do to close off this blog (and I know I’ve rambled on for ages) is to provide some counter-examples of where male suffering is either ignored or not given enough attention as female suffering.

If we do live in a rape culture, is it perhaps when the Steubenville boys get arrested and put in prison for rape, yet stuff like this goes unnoticed):


And the response to it:


Or perhaps the number of stories (which is just a small selection of stuff out there) that show female teachers getting extremely lenient sentences:


Or perhaps a Tumblr feminist flat out lying about rape culture


Or a report that shows victimisation of young boys in juvenile detention centres being questioned by a feminist, who comes across as a rape-apologiser for suggesting that rape ‘without force’ isn’t rape:


And then filing a case against the person who called her out, also resulting in a death threat:


Or a 16 year old boy being forced to pay child support for his rapist’s baby:


Or a poll in Brazil that shows 65% of women deserve to be attacked for dressing provocatively:


Which was then shown to be wrong:


Or a question printed in a textbook that seems appalling, but is in fact misleading:


I’m sorry, I don’t have the link to why it’s misleading, but basically the questions were not given a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer but rather a 5 point scale, which means the answers aren’t that definite.

Or the FBI changing its definition of rape after 85 years:

Rape is “Penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim.’


But still seems to exclude male victims that are forced to penetrate, which studies show occur at similar rates to women:


And then seeing people like Charles Clymer claim this as a victory for feminism:


Or the feminist who tried to defend the woman in this story:


By saying she was a ‘victim of the patriarchy’:


Or this man being raped at knifepoint:


Or this anecdote by a friend of mine:


Or this astonishingly ignorant set of comments by two feminists discussing female on male rape:








Or this video made by a male rape survivor:



See, there are loads of examples of rape towards men that are completely under the radar, ignored, minimised, disregarded, disbelieved, yet not a single one of them was addressed in the article on Everyday Feminism. That article was written on March 10th 2014, so it’s not like it’s an outdated piece of work, yet it fails to mention a single instance of rape culture towards men, aside from a shaky 1-in-71 statistic which I’m going to assume was put in there as way to show that ‘feminism is working on men’s issues too’.

You can’t claim a ‘culture’ exists by only looking at one side. I could easily claim a rape culture exists towards males. I’m not going to because I don’t think we live in one. We live in a society where people do and say some stupid, fucked-up things, but that’s not indicative of the way the entire society feels. Some of the 25 examples display some questionable morality (Blurred Lines for example), some of them rely on one set of statistics to prove their point, and some of them are manipulative in their content (the 3% of rapists seeing jail particularly).

Yes, people have said and done stupid things, but they’ve also been punished for it. I hardly think we live in a society that ‘ignores, trivialises and normalises’ rape if people are being punished for the things they do and say. Yes, some rapists get off with lenient sentences, but that goes for both genders, and not just the crime of rape. To only focus on one crime and one gender, particularly when that crime is abhorred and that gender protected as much as possible, is not enough to claim we live in any type of ‘culture’.

I’m not saying the statistics I presented are cast-iron truth, but the fact they actually exist casts doubt on the statistics used by feminists that they do try to pass off as absolute fact.

Rape is a horrible crime; I would wish it on nobody. However, I also do not want to push forward a theory that only focuses on one gender and then say it’s indicative of the terrible culture we live in. Unless you start including the myriad of male victims, and stop using ambiguous songs like Blurred Lines as absolute proof, then you’ll never convince me that ‘rape-culture’ exists.

Have a nice day, folks!

  1. Francisco Beanburger says:

    One thing I’d like to question regarding the existence of “rape culture”: We live in a society that romanticises the criminal. Robin Hood, the greatest outlaw of legend, always presented as a dashingly handsome figure. In more recent times, we’ve had bent cozzers in “The Shield”, pickpockets in “Fingersmith”, conmen/women in “Hustle”, heck we’ve even had a serial killer in “Dexter” which goes to show that society can even sympathise with a murderer if he’s charming enough. But we’ve never had a programme where a rapist is the protagonist. Why? Surely, if we lived in this “rape culture” that condones, normalises and trivialises sexual violence against women, than why hasn’t some quick thinking TV exec capitalised on this potentially profitable niche market? I’ll tell you why: We do NOT live in a society that condones, normalises and trivialises sexual violence against women, we live in a society that abhors and severely punishes sexual violence against women. If society has such a laissez faire attitude to sexual violence against women, why is merely the accusation of this crime enough to destroy a man’s reputation and career and possibly incite vigilante attacks against those accused? Why is there so much media sympathy for women who receive rape threats, that’s right- threats, on social media? How was the liar Anita Sarkeesian able to con almost three times the amount for her kickstarter campaign if this society has such a tolerance of rape? If anyone can counter the points I’ve made, I’ll be happy to discuss the possibility of such a phenomenon as “rape culture”. And so my watch begins. ps. You killed it again JS, I swear the uni list is on the way, if you’re still up for it. Peace and fucking.

  2. We need to stop claiming men & women can be raped & class it as sexual assault, the correct definition of rape

    Also sexual assault is evidence based, instead of the hysteria based criteria of rape

    We need to move to an evidence based criteria for rape, to avoid batshit women from claiming everything is rape

  3. […] 25 everyday examples of rape-culture: an exploration. April 10, 2014 […]

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